Two things happened on the beach that day
Two things happened on the beach that day.
Sometimes the little things are the Big Things.
Sunshine on my shoulders. Oh how things change.
I remember the days of sunning at the beach and staying out there for hours. Of course, I did ridiculous stuff like only wearing Level 4 Sunscreen when I was younger. Sometimes no sunscreen if I was tanning in the backyard with baby oil. Really? It was the 80's y'all - everyone was doing it! Still was so dumb though. So as an adult I did become smarter about using higher strength sunscreen. I used 30 SPF at least and sometimes higher.
Since my PSa diagnosis and reading about Psoriasis you see so much conflicting information about sunning. I have read -
"Do not get burned - it will give you a flare - your body's immune system will attack"
"Do get some sun - it's good for your skin"
"Sun gives you Vitamin D - go outside"
I could go on - but you have probably read some of the same and if not more. But here is the deal - WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT. For some the sun works well for them, even helps, for some of us, it does not. My first psoriasis flare was years ago and sunning made it worse - but just in the isolated area where the skin was affected. It went away and did not reappear for years. However, the last few years my psoriasis turned into Psoriatic Arthritis with a major flare. That is when all of my skin did not like the sun at all.
I used to get in the sun and when I would begin to get pink I would layer up on 45 strength SPF. That would stop the burning and I would then get a little bit of that bronze glow that says "SUMMER TIME" and "I HAVE BEEN TO THE BEACH or POOL."
But that changed, we noticed that no matter how much sunscreen I used, no matter how much and how often, I had reached a point where I would severely burn every time I went out to the beach for the day. My skin would literally swell and I would be feverish. I was not yet formally diagnosed with PSa. When I was diagnosed a couple years later, those sunburns made sense. My skin was being attacked from the inside out. Then I was in the sun and for me - the sun exposure was a real problem and dangerous to my skin.
Y'all, this was probably one of the saddest days of my life when I realized no more long sunny beach days for me! Seriously, in eastern North Carolina it is a thing - you go to the beach - A LOT! So this year I was not terribly excited about the long beach weekends we usually take several times in the summer. Sitting on the beach all day under an umbrella - no tan to show - really? Everyone else has that great summer tan going on and here I am looking like a white bed sheet. Before you say self tanner - know that I tried and it made my skin psoriasis worse. Ugh. (If you have any recommendations for one - please email me!)
Then I realized - I had to re-train my brain. So I did something . . .
I woke up one Saturday, left a messy house and jumped in the car and went to the beach. I had been having some issues with my feet hurting so badly and my hands as well. Just a bit of skin psoriasis flaring too. My thought was - the beach will make it all better. I can soak in the salt water.
Soon I was humming the John Denver song - "sunshine on my shoulders", my skin began to feel like it was on fire. We managed to get the umbrella in the ground to stay and that kept me covered. I did use 45 sunscreen and stay under the umbrella. Just short intervals down in the water without the umbrella. No tanning, too afraid of how my skin would react. I sat there for the day under that umbrella and my thoughts changed - I could re-train my brain.
How many times had I sat on that beach laying on a blanket with my eyes closed and soaking up the sun. Checking tan lines, using spray, flipping every 30 minutes to keep it even. This time at the beach, I sat under an umbrella. I can just chill and relax and enjoy the view. But now I see the beach in a new way. It has always been a very lovely sight to see. But that day I saw the beach in an entirely new way - the sea looked greener, sky bluer, clouds whiter. It was as if God opened my eyes to a new beach, a new view, one that I will enjoy moving forward and under an umbrella.
The second thing I realized - it is time for physical therapy. Yep. Have to face facts. When your son wants to take the "annual same pic on same beach" for this year, and you see your posture, and the wince on your face and a fabricated smile - you see reality. While my pain is manageable and my treatment plan is showing some success, it is obvious my body could use some new re-training as well.
I learned two things that day - - sometimes we are waiting for the circumstance to change, when we are in the circumstance to be changed. I saw that pic of that pale white lady under an umbrella. Although her body and skin has changed - it showed that I can adapt and adjust my sails, or in this case adjust my umbrella. I was glad I had trusted the inner voice that God whispered to me and get out of the house and go to the beach that day, so I could experience this new healing.
PSa has shown me several things, and not all of it has been bad. God is talking to me and showing me new things everyday in a new way. I trust His plan a lot more than mine. Just like those waves covering my feet, His love covers me and also you.
©lisacarol99@gmail.com
Sometimes the little things are the Big Things.
Sunshine on my shoulders. Oh how things change.
I remember the days of sunning at the beach and staying out there for hours. Of course, I did ridiculous stuff like only wearing Level 4 Sunscreen when I was younger. Sometimes no sunscreen if I was tanning in the backyard with baby oil. Really? It was the 80's y'all - everyone was doing it! Still was so dumb though. So as an adult I did become smarter about using higher strength sunscreen. I used 30 SPF at least and sometimes higher.
Since my PSa diagnosis and reading about Psoriasis you see so much conflicting information about sunning. I have read -
"Do not get burned - it will give you a flare - your body's immune system will attack"
"Do get some sun - it's good for your skin"
"Sun gives you Vitamin D - go outside"
I could go on - but you have probably read some of the same and if not more. But here is the deal - WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT. For some the sun works well for them, even helps, for some of us, it does not. My first psoriasis flare was years ago and sunning made it worse - but just in the isolated area where the skin was affected. It went away and did not reappear for years. However, the last few years my psoriasis turned into Psoriatic Arthritis with a major flare. That is when all of my skin did not like the sun at all.
I used to get in the sun and when I would begin to get pink I would layer up on 45 strength SPF. That would stop the burning and I would then get a little bit of that bronze glow that says "SUMMER TIME" and "I HAVE BEEN TO THE BEACH or POOL."
But that changed, we noticed that no matter how much sunscreen I used, no matter how much and how often, I had reached a point where I would severely burn every time I went out to the beach for the day. My skin would literally swell and I would be feverish. I was not yet formally diagnosed with PSa. When I was diagnosed a couple years later, those sunburns made sense. My skin was being attacked from the inside out. Then I was in the sun and for me - the sun exposure was a real problem and dangerous to my skin.
Y'all, this was probably one of the saddest days of my life when I realized no more long sunny beach days for me! Seriously, in eastern North Carolina it is a thing - you go to the beach - A LOT! So this year I was not terribly excited about the long beach weekends we usually take several times in the summer. Sitting on the beach all day under an umbrella - no tan to show - really? Everyone else has that great summer tan going on and here I am looking like a white bed sheet. Before you say self tanner - know that I tried and it made my skin psoriasis worse. Ugh. (If you have any recommendations for one - please email me!)
Then I realized - I had to re-train my brain. So I did something . . .
I woke up one Saturday, left a messy house and jumped in the car and went to the beach. I had been having some issues with my feet hurting so badly and my hands as well. Just a bit of skin psoriasis flaring too. My thought was - the beach will make it all better. I can soak in the salt water.
Soon I was humming the John Denver song - "sunshine on my shoulders", my skin began to feel like it was on fire. We managed to get the umbrella in the ground to stay and that kept me covered. I did use 45 sunscreen and stay under the umbrella. Just short intervals down in the water without the umbrella. No tanning, too afraid of how my skin would react. I sat there for the day under that umbrella and my thoughts changed - I could re-train my brain.
How many times had I sat on that beach laying on a blanket with my eyes closed and soaking up the sun. Checking tan lines, using spray, flipping every 30 minutes to keep it even. This time at the beach, I sat under an umbrella. I can just chill and relax and enjoy the view. But now I see the beach in a new way. It has always been a very lovely sight to see. But that day I saw the beach in an entirely new way - the sea looked greener, sky bluer, clouds whiter. It was as if God opened my eyes to a new beach, a new view, one that I will enjoy moving forward and under an umbrella.
The second thing I realized - it is time for physical therapy. Yep. Have to face facts. When your son wants to take the "annual same pic on same beach" for this year, and you see your posture, and the wince on your face and a fabricated smile - you see reality. While my pain is manageable and my treatment plan is showing some success, it is obvious my body could use some new re-training as well.
I learned two things that day - - sometimes we are waiting for the circumstance to change, when we are in the circumstance to be changed. I saw that pic of that pale white lady under an umbrella. Although her body and skin has changed - it showed that I can adapt and adjust my sails, or in this case adjust my umbrella. I was glad I had trusted the inner voice that God whispered to me and get out of the house and go to the beach that day, so I could experience this new healing.
PSa has shown me several things, and not all of it has been bad. God is talking to me and showing me new things everyday in a new way. I trust His plan a lot more than mine. Just like those waves covering my feet, His love covers me and also you.
©lisacarol99@gmail.com
Love
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